don't forget!

in case you haven't heard, google reader is set to disappear from the world on monday.  i migrated all my current google reader subscriptions over to bloglovin, and i am happy with it.  the app is great (i do most of my blog reading while i'm nursing and/or pumping).  it makes is super easy to follow new blogs.  and, if you sign up before google reader goes away, it will automatically migrate everything for you.  easy-peasy, lemon squeezy! 

follow me over at bloglovin!

in vino veritas

on saturday, my sister and anthony and quinn came for a visit.  it was quinn's first time traveling, and the little guy did pretty well!  saturday night after the kidlets were in bed, the 4 of us sat out back on the patio and had some drinks and talked about parenthood and all that comes with it.  we swapped delivery stories (my labor and subsequent vaginal delivery and callie's scheduled c-section, since quinn was breech).  and then the boys started talking about the first time they saw their sons.  and, you guys, it was the sweetest thing.  i'll keep their words to myself, because it was private emotional things that were said in the sanctity of our back porch, but i nearly cried listening to matt talk about those first few moments.  i could cry now just thinking about it. 

watching matt be a daddy - playing with daxon, trying to make him laugh, feeding him a bottle, giving him a bath - is my greatest joy in life.  on saturday night, when we were in bed, i told him as much.  i told him how much i love watching him be a daddy.  i told him how proud i am of him.  i told him how my heart swells at the way daxon looks at him.

we said things that night that we simply hadn't gotten around to saying to each other yet.

in vino veritas...

playtime

daxon and i got some quality playtime in this evening.  i could not possible love this kid more.

5 months

nicknames: dax, d, bubbers, munchkin, and tyke.  uncle dan calls him d-man.

likes: putting everything in sight into his mouth.  talking and yelling.  kicking his legs like he's training for a marathon.  playing peek-a-boo.

dislikes: being burped in the middle of eating.  getting into his car seat.

milestones: he is really starting to talk now.  he mostly talks with his mouth closed, using his tongue to make "sounds" inside his mouth.  it's kind of hard to explain, but it's hysterical.  he loves to shriek and yell.  he is laughing a lot more.  and of course we had our first hospital visit, which was a milestone i could have done without.  he's able to roll over back to front and front to back, but he struggles with it.  i kind of think he just doesn't care enough.  he can sit assisted, and can tripod sit for a few seconds if he's really concentrating on it.  and he's doing better with tummy time.  he loves to pull his blanket or burp cloth over his face, then pull it down - playing peek-a-boo!  he is using his exersaucer a lot, now, too.

clothing size: mostly into his 3-6 month or 6 month stuff.  we just gave a big bag of 3 month stuff to cousin quinn.  we also graduated to medium size sleep sacks.  

sleep: we are still feeding to sleep, and i kind of don't care anymore.  we attempted to change up the routine, and it didn't go so well.  the first night it actually went great, but the second night was an enormous disaster.  he started to fuss and we let him go for 3 minutes.  i went up, gave him his paci, and stayed with him till he calmed down.  a couple minutes later, he started to fuss again.  we let him go 5 minutes until matt went up.  he would not calm down.  after another 5 minutes of matt trying to comfort him, i finally gave in and nursed him to sleep.  we talked about it, and since he doesn't need to nurse (ie, he doesn't need me), we're ok with him eating to sleep (boob or bottle).  occasionally he wakes up in the night, but we just give him his paci and he's right back down.

naps: still napping pretty regularly.  if we miss a naptime, or if the schedule gets thrown off on the weekend, he doesn't meltdown.  it means we can be pretty flexible, which is really great.

eating: right before his 5-month birthday, i started increasing his bottles to 6oz.  he was finishing every bottle during the day, and sometimes on the weekends we thought he seemed hungry after finishing a 5oz bottle.  so he now gets 18oz in bottles, plus 3 nursing sessions. 

i know i keep saying this, but we really are lucky with him.  he is so good, so happy.  we are having so much fun with him.  he definitely has a little personality and we love seeing that develop. here are a few pictures from our 5-month photo shoot...

and a few other random shots from the month...

he loves to pull that blanket down over his head

saturday morning naps with daddy are the best!

exersaucer time!

first time in the pool!

piggies!

first father's day

first trip to the e.d.

yes, folks, that is a hospital bracelet with my baby's name on it.  this morning, at 6am, there we were, taking daxon to the emergency room.  not exactly the way i'd hoped we'd start off father's day weekend.

dax woke up around 5:45, so i went down to nurse him with hopes that i'd be able to get him back to sleep.  he nursed for about 4 minutes then fell asleep, so i placed him back in his crib.  as soon as i put him down, he woke up, and rather than fight with him, i picked him up to continue feeding him.  before i had the chance, though, he spit up all down my back.  i laid him down on the footrest of the glider and started to clean myself up. i looked away for a split second, and then i heard it: thud.  i looked back to see his body hit the floor and heard a second thud.  he immediately started to scream, and i ran to get him.  he was face-down on the hardwood floor.  i picked him up and started to comfort him, trying to remain calm myself...and failing miserably.  i was hysterical.  matt came running out of the bedroom, and i handed daxon over to him because i was shaking so much i was afraid to hold him.  he had already stopped crying and was smiling and laughing, but i called our pediatrician to see if we needed to take him to the emergency room.  she reassured me that he was probably fine, but said we should take him in, just to get him checked out. 

so off we went, with daxon smiling away.  he got all checked out and within 45 minutes, we were on our way back out the door.  the doctor told us that the only way to ensure that he is ok is to give him a head ct, but there is a lot of radiation exposure, so he would only do it if he was exhibiting concerning behavior, which he wasn't.  he said that if daxon starts acting strangely, we should bring him back in and they'll do the scan.  our discharge instructions were basically just to keep an eye on him.

i'm not entirely sure what happened, but i think he basically pushed himself backwards off the footrest, landing first on his head, then flipping backwards and landing on his belly.  it was absolutely terrifying, but the doctor and nurses assured us that he'll be fine.  they also all told us that their own kids have fallen on their heads and they're all fine.  but that just reinforces that you can't take your hands off them, even for just a split second.  from now on he either goes on the floor or in something secure.

he still seems fine, and in another hour we're out of the danger zone.  but it's certainly something i don't need to experience ever again.

exploring faith

i know i've mentioned before that religion and church were never a big part of my life.  i was baptized at about 18 months old.  my parents took my sister at around the same age, and the pastor at the church told them that she would go to hell since she hadn't already been baptized.  so my sister was baptized when she was 15, when she asked for it.  i never had a formal first communion, and i never was confirmed.  i just one day started going up and taking communion.  i have absolutely no idea if that is even legal, but the way i look at is that jesus simply doesn't seem like the kind of guy who would care about formal ceremonies.  from the little that i've read and heard about him, he seemed like a pretty laid-back, accepting kind of person.  i doubt he cares whether or not i went through some ritualistic thing to receive the sacrament.  at least i'm doing it.  who knows, maybe i'm wrong.  but so far, i haven't been struck down, so i guess it's working ok for everyone involved.

despite all of this, i felt that it was important to get daxon baptized. we scheduled it at the church in hershey where we got married.  pastor cindy gave us a bunch of reading materials related to baptism: a book for daxon about the magic of water, a copy of the baptism program, and a book about baptism for parents and sponsors.  we have asked my sister and anthony to be daxon's godparents (sidenote, are they even considered godparents if they're not catholic?).  i started reading the book about baptism and it really got me thinking about my own faith.

in all honesty, i'm not entirely sure of what exactly i believe in.  i'm not really sure that anyone "answers" prayers.  i think that you can say a prayer and someone hears it, but the ultimate ending to that story is that fate is already decided.  what is going to happen is going to happen, no matter how many people pray for a different outcome.  despite that, i have found that when things are feeling particularly bleak, saying a prayer brings me peace.  i find peace in attending church and putting my concerns and fears and hopes into the universe.  so i think that i believe that there is a higher power that is driving our life, but the direction that it takes and the events that happen are already predetermined. 

and with confessing of sins and all that, i'm not really sure that i believe that confessing my sins to a higher power truly absolves me of that action.  what's done is done.  but i do believe that in the end, all of my indiscretions will be forgiven.  forgiven, not forgotten, which is how i live my own life.

i am still weeding through my thoughts on jesus and being the son of god and the second-coming.  in fact, i am still weeding through a lot of it.  but for now, matt and i have found a local church that we like and we are hoping to attend more regularly and get a bit more involved.  if not for our sake, then for daxon's. 

news notes

when trends die - i am so over mustaches.  can we move on from them, please?

21 kids who sold out their parents - omg, this is hysterical.  i wonder what daxon is going to come up with some day?

to parents of small children - i found this the day after i had a particularly tough night with daxon.  i kind of want to print it out and keep copies of it all over my house.  it's absolute perfection.

ncaa bans hastags, social media urls on football fields - the ncaa proves once again that it sucks.

the courage of teachers - this is so true.  i mean, you look at these teachers from the schools in oklahoma.  and the teachers at sandy hook, or columbine, or....any other school.  they aren't paid to protect our children.  they are paid to teach them.  that is all.  and yet here they are, laying down their lives for children who aren't their own. 

mars, nestle, hershey accused of chocolate price-fixing conspiracy in canada - while this looks bad for hershey, i secretly hope that mars and nestle are both found guilty.  hershey's outright admission of guilt and cooperation in the investigation will look a lot better compared to 2 companies who lied about it!

brad pitt surprises local fans at world war z screening - son of a bitch.  this is 20 minutes from our house.  why wasn't i there????