tips for my sister

i've been putting together a list of tips for my sister, who is due on may 7th with her first baby (another boy in the family!).  i thought, since i have a few preggos reading, that i'd put them in a blog post.  maybe they'll help, maybe they won't.  but here they are...

- earth mama angel baby nipple butter.  way better than lansinoh lanolin.

- get at least 2 additional top sheets for the zip sheets.  i had registered, based on advice of my dear friend abriel, for quickzip sheets for the crib.  callie thought they were a good idea, so she also registered for them.  i have one sheet set (with the zipper base and top sheet), plus one additional top sheet.  one more top sheet would be nice to have.

- video monitor.  not only because it's nice to put an eye on daxon when he starts to fuss, but also because it's entertaining to watch him "twitch" in his sleep while he's swaddled.  it's like watching a burrito dance.

- skip the sleep sheep.  based on a ton of "must have" lists that i looked i, i foolishly registered for the sleep sheep.  daxon hated it.  the sheep only runs for 45 minutes then shuts off.  matt and i need white noise in our bedroom all night - if we lose power in the middle of the night, i will wake up because the fan will stop running.  i should have known that our offspring would also need constant white noise.  i ended up going out and purchasing a white noise machine (we got the graco sweet slumber machine - it plays white noise and lullabies, plus you can plug your mp3 player into it, and it runs on ac power or battery power).

- have a lamp and/or nightlight next to where you'll nurse (like, in arm's length).  i do not have anything next to the glider, and so sometimes in the middle of the night when i'm having a hard time getting daxon back to sleep, i have to get up, walk over to the lamp, and turn it off, which just stimulates him even more.  it would be really nice to just reach over and switch it off, or at least dim it.  i am looking into a way to make this happen in his room.

- get at least one easy swaddler, like the swaddleme blanket.  i use the aden + anais swaddle blankets, which means i have to manually wrap him myself.  that's fine for me, but i worry the grandparents may struggle, so we have one halo sleepsack swaddle, so we can use it with or without his arms pinned down.

- get lots of burp cloths and stash them everywhere.  i like the gerber cloth diapers, as recommended by several people.

- both of you (ie, both parents) should download the baby connect app on your phones.  this helps you track everything - nursing, pumping, bottles, sleeping, diapers, doctor's appointments... it syncs between however many people have access to your account, and you can even send each other messages.

- get some ky jelly for the rectal thermometer.  i told this story already.
 
- don't be surprised if you find yourself crying harder than you've cried in years.  and totally out of nowhere.  daxon pops off his latch during feeding?  cue hysterics.  postpartum hormones are no joke.

- don't bother freezing pads for postpartum.  see if you can get some of the ice packs from the hospital.  callie froze maxipads for me (we'd both read it on some blogs) but it was a major fail.  they just fold back up in the freezer.  plus, what happens when they melt?  sounds messy.  the hospital gives you these ice packs that you crack and put in the mesh panties.  they were awesome, and i'm so mad i didn't get any to bring home.  stock up on pads, tucks pads, and hydrocortisone cream.  and a rubber donut to take the pressure off your seat!

- watch and learn the 5 s's.  we didn't think to employ these techniques until one desperate evening when daxon was incredibly fussy.  but i swaddled him (1), put him on his side on my legs (2), jimmied my legs about to "shake" him (3), and stuck his paci in his mouth (4) - we use the 5th s (shushing) occasionally, too.  within 30 seconds he was silent, and within 5 minutes he was sound asleep.

- don't throw away boxes for stuff!  as we unpacked stuff from my shower, we broke down and threw out (or recycled) the packaging.  i now have a sleep sheep and a twilight turtle that are getting no use, but i can't return them because i threw out the packaging.  dumb.  hopefully i can consign them somewhere.

reasons why i love my chiropractor

i started seeing a chiropractor in november or december (i honestly don't remember when my first appointment was).  it was recommended to me by a couple of friends who i'd complained about my back pain to, and also several of the bees on hellobee were singing the praises of their chiropractors.  so even though i'd always been skeptical of chiros, i thought i'd give it a chance.  i knew i wanted to find someone who specialized in prenatal chiropractics because i know that we preggos have special needs and circumstances, and that our bodies may not be able to handle the rigors of "normal" chiropractics.  so i googled "prenatal chiropractor, abington, pa."  that brought up a list of a few in the area, but in perusing their websites i realized they weren't exactly what i was looking for.  well, one was, but when i read that they don't bill insurance, they were out.  i modified my search from abington to philadelphia, and about the 5th hit down i found the icpa website (international chiropractic pediatric association).  the first name on the list for the philadelphia search was the same one i'd already found who didn't take insurance.  the second name was dr. tara at hatboro family wellness.  as i looked over her website, i felt like i had found what i was looking for.  it seemed like she practiced from a holistic approach, treating not only the body but also the body's connection to the mind and overall wellness.  so i called and scheduled my intake assessment.

she spent 1 1/2 hours with me at  my initial appointment.  we went over everything - my medical history, my family history, my social history, my emotional history...it was incredibly comprehensive.  and then, after all that, she did the actual exam.  she discovered that i have a mild scoliosis.  she also discovered (as had my neurologist) that i have a slight head tilt to the left, and therefore my right muscles work extra hard to correct that.  and i have a leg-length discrepancy, in that my right leg is longer than my left (my right hip sits lower). anyway, given my assessment, and the fact that i was in excruciating pain on a near-daily basis, i was excited to get my treatment started.

i see dr. tara anywhere from 1-3 times a week, depending on my schedule and how i'm feeling (there have been a couple of times that i've cancelled my appointment because i've just been too freaking tired to make the drive - it's 15-20 minutes).  at each session, i start face-up and she does some neck adjustments.  then i flip to my stomach (using a special pillow with a hole in it for my belly) and she does some more adjustments to my back, and during the past few sessions she's also started focusing a lot on my sacrum and pubic bone, which feels awesome.  then i sit up and she gently massages my neck and back.  i don't always notice a difference right away, but definitely the next day i feel looser, less painful, and like i have a little bit more energy.

but that's not the only reason i like her.  at every session, she asks me a question regarding my overall wellness.  a few times it was just to tell her one thing that made me feel good that day.  given that it was the end of the year, she asked me once what accomplishment i was most proud of.  with the new year, she asked me what my resolutions are (but totally understood that resolutions hadn't even crossed my mind, what-with all the baby thoughts taking up space in my brain).  we've talked a lot about labor and delivery, too.  given that she's from this holistic point of view, she's very crunchy - more crunchy than i am.  she had her 2 babies at home with no medications - not even an option for medication.  i'm pretty sure she doesn't believe in vaccinations, though i've avoided that topic with her because i am such a strong proponent for vaccines.

last night, she asked me what is the central theme to my thoughts regarding labor and delivery.  my answer was that i really hope i can do it without medication.  i really mean all medication, but we focused mostly on pain medication last night.  she asked me why i have such a concern about it, and if i was getting pressure from anyone to use medication.  i'm not, though it is discouraging to have my friends look at me like i have 85 heads when i tell them that i hope to go med-free.  matt fully supports my decision to go without, and my doctors seem to be willing to go along with whatever i want, though i do need to discuss this more in-depth with them at our next appointment.  i'm more afraid that my body or more specifically that i won't be able to handle it.  so she reminded me that one of the biggest weapons that women have to manage labor is relaxation techniques, and asked me what thoughts i had about relaxation.  i told her that i think one of the biggest things for me will be music - music has always been a huge part of my life, and i can use music to transport me away from situations, to ease my mind, to pump me up - whatever i need, music has always been there for me.  i told her that i've been working on creating a labor and delivery playlist with calming, soothing music to help me turn inward and focus on myself.  i also am creating another playlist with just instrumental, relaxing music (mostly movie soundtrack music) - that is what helped me fall asleep during hurricane tomas on our honeymoon - i plugged in my earbuds and turned on the harry potter soundtrack to drown out the wind.  i've thought about making a more upbeat, motivational list for when it comes time to push, too, but i don't really want baby to enter the world the sounds of something like "sexyback," by justin timberlake.  i think creating a push playlist would take a lot more creativity and thought than my relaxing playlist, and i just don't have the energy for that.  maybe when i'm home on maternity leave (if baby doesn't come before i start) i'll work on it. 

she said that music worked really well for her, and at one point during her labor she actually had her husband take her ipod of the dock and just hand her her earbuds so she could fully drown out the noise around her.  i don't think i would hesitate to do that, honestly.  i know what music does for me, and i know that would probably help me a lot. 

then we started talking about other relaxation techniques.  she asked me if there was any position that i'd practiced or found that helped, and i told her that in our childbirth class we'd learned several, and i had found that the most effective one for me was to sit facing matt, with my head on his chest, while he rubs my neck, back, and arms.  another one that worked was when we stood facing each other, and i put my arms around his neck and just kind of hung there while we rocked back and forth and he rubbed my back.  she also reminded me about gentle touch, and that oftentimes women find that very soothing.  one of my favorite things is when matt lightly strokes the inside of my arm, so i will definitely have to keep that in mind.

i am so glad she brought that topic up and we talked about it.  it made me feel a zillion times more confident, realizing that i do have several effective relaxation techniques in my arsenal.

now i just have to get over - or better yet face - my fear of induction...

the learning never ends

matt and i had decided that we would "let nature happen" for the first few months.  we didn't want to put too much pressure on ourselves to get pregnant, knowing that the more stressed out about you get, the harder it is to actually conceive.  we also decided that we didn't want to be worrying about it over the holidays.  nothing says "awkward" like having to duck out of family christmas for a quick roll in the hay, right?  so we said we'd just take it easy for the first 6 months and if nothing had happened by then, we'd ramp it up by starting to track my ovulation cycles and paying attention to things like basal body temperature (bbt) and cervical mucus (cm).

so even though we had decided we'd wait to really start paying attention to the "signs of ovulation," i immediately downloaded an ovulation tracking app on my phone (i'm using ovuview).  i figured if i started tracking it now, i'd have a much better idea of my cycle pattern by the time we were ready to take it more seriously. 

what i found once i started tracking was that i was woefully naive about ovulation and cycles and all that stuff.  or stupid, take your pick.  nonetheless, here are a few things that i was so incredibly wrong about:

• you're not necessarily "fertile" for the entire cycle.  i don't know, maybe it was all the scare tactics they used in middle and high school, but i always believed that, other than during your period, your uterus is ripe for the impregnating.  turns out, that's not really true.  there's a small window of time during which you can get pregnant - about 10 days in the middle of your cycle.  otherwise, you're in the (first) menstruation phase or the (third) luteal phase.  i seriously had no idea.
• i had also always assumed, probably from tv shows and movies (don't they always say "i'm ovulating, we need to have sex right now!"?), that your best bet of getting pregnant was to have sex on your ovulation day.  again, turns out, that's not entirely accurate.  the most efficient time is the day or two before your ovulation day.  who knew?
• i also believed that implantation happened, like, immediately.  uh, nope.  first, the sperm hooks up with the egg, and they sort of float around, flirting with each other, getting to know each other...you know, kind of dating.  then, after about a week to 10 days, they decide to make a commitment and latch on to the wall.  oh, and apparently, you might be able to feel that.  say what?!
• i always knew that you should wait until you miss a period to take a pregnancy test, but i never really understood why.  well, it's because your hormone levels take a bit to adjust.  what those pregnancy tests are looking for is your hCG (human chorionic gonadotropin) level.  not to get too scientific on you, but hCG is a protein that is by a developing embryo to stimulate an increased production in progesterone.  progesterone, in turn, causes the lining of the uterus to thicken so that it can sustain a developing fetus.  {seriously, aren't our bodies amazing?}  anyway, it takes about 7-10 days to for hCH to get to a detectable level.  that's why we wait.

these discoveries of my complete lack of knowledge kind of freaked me out.  so i started researching and reading to get a much clearer and better understanding of what the heck goes on down in that reproductive zone of my body.  it was an eye-opening experience, to say the least.