i'm not sure exactly what i'm feeling right now. i'm so tired, i think i'm a bit numb. i have been having a lot of trouble sleeping lately. i wake up in the middle of the night and it takes me [what feels like] hours to fall back asleep. this morning, i woke up around 3:45 and laid there tossing and turning, trying to convince myself to fall back asleep. i didn't feel tired, though. plus, i had absolutely horrible cramps and couldn't get comfortable. so at 4:30, i gave up and got up and went downstairs. i sat down there watching jersey shore and cuddling with padfoot. minus the actual getting up and getting out of bed, this has happened pretty much every night this week. needless to say, i'm completely exhausted right now.
this week has been nuts at work. we completely blame the full moon on crazy moments at work, and this week is no different. plus with the solar flares throwing off magnetic fields and then apparently mercury is in retrograde...? now i don't claim to know much about astrology but i do know that mercury in retrograde is some bad mamma-jamma. so, yeah, this week has pretty much sucked the big one. by wednesday there had already been 11 psych placements in the hospital that we knew of. there have been at least 3 more since then. that is definitely not normal. i have no idea if that's what's affecting my sleep this week, but i kind of hope it is so that i can get back to my normal sleep pattern soon. i can't take much more of this.
it's also upsetting me because i can't keep track of my bbt. you're supposed to take it at the same time every day, when you first wake up, after you've been asleep for 3 hours straight. that is not happening. so i haven't taken my bbt in a few days. i've decided that i'm going to get an opk now and try things that way this time around. one bright note - my predicted o-date changed, so matt will be home for
the "important" part of the cycle. not sure why it changed, but
whatever, it did, so we'll hopefully have a better chance at taking
advantage of the fertile window. with the opks, that should help nail
it down a bit, too. i'm hoping that will make up for the lack of bbt
patterns. i found a set on amazon that includes 40 opks and 10 hpts for $10. i'll take it.
my lack of sleep also puts me in a shitty mood and can be a trigger for my migraines. so far it hasn't, and thank goodness it's the weekend and we don't really have any plans so i can crash whenever i feel one coming. i just hope it all passes quickly because i'm pretty sure not sleeping is stressing me out about the bbts and not being able to get accurate bbts is stressing me out which is causing me to not sleep. vicious cycle.