in events like this, i tend to avoid the news. i didn't watch the news at all. i read one article and cried my way through half of it before matt told me to stop reading it. i simply cannot read about it and not put myself in the places of those parents, teachers, staff, and families. and i can't possibly imagine the thoughts of those little babies. it just breaks my heart. and so i say a prayer and turn it off.
last night as i scrolled through my facebook news feed, reading all of my friends' status updates about hugging their kids tighter, i could help but feel deeply deeply saddened. and then i read honest toddler's update, "so many angels. can you see them?" and that's when i broke. as i sat and felt this little boy rutching around in my belly, i couldn't help but fixate on it a bit more. and i just cried. and cried and cried and cried. given yesterday's tragedy, part of me now wants to keep him inside me forever, where i can keep him safe and snuggled up next to me. of course, i know that's not realistic, and while part of me wants him to stay inside me forever, the stronger part of me wants to meet him and hold him and kiss him and cuddle him. we won't be able to keep him safe from harm at all times. i'm not naive enough to believe that. so all i can do is pray for his safety and teach him how to stay as safe as possible at all times. it's the best we can do as parents.
on tuesday, december 18, i'll be participating in the blogger day of silence in support of sandy hook.
i will post nothing but this button. there's not much i can do from here to support the families and citizens of sandy hook, but this is at least something. spreading the word and helping people who want to donate do so.
keeping the families of sandy hook in my heart and prayers.